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I Miss My Separated Husband And Fear That He’s Never Coming Back
There are times in your life when it is easy to fear the worst. Even if you are an optimist by nature, when faced with the reality that you fear and dread the most, you tend to let your mind wander to unpleasant places and expect the worst to happen to you.
This is very common. Unfortunately, your fear can lead you to do things you wouldn’t otherwise do, so your worst case scenario becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. It’s not unusual to expect the worst during a breakup. For example, a woman may say: “My husband and I have been separated for about six months.” If you had told me at the beginning of the separation that things would be this bad, I would not have believed it. When my husband left home and said we were separated, he said it would only be for a short time. The separation has been for a while. My husband doesn’t call me. I ask my friends if they can ask about me and they admit that they don’t agree, they just act like I’m annoying them. When we broke up for the first time, I thought that he would be coming back in less than three months. I never thought that this much time would pass, and I have to be honest, now I think that he will never come back, and I miss him so much. I’m usually a happy person, but this has really brought me down. n the beginning of our separation, I tried to reach my husband all the time, but he would not accept me. I still try, but not often because it’s too hard to say no. Some of my friends and family tell me that I should just accept that they are not coming back and I think they are right. But this is very sad for me and I can see that it affects me more than I thought. How do you think that the man who is separated from her who misses her so much may not come back?”
Maybe I am not the best person to ask because, despite the evidence to the contrary, I have not accepted that my husband is not coming back. But things got so bad that at one point it became clear to me that I needed to live. I did not leave my husband or my marriage. And I felt that if we divorce, then he will have to follow. I left it alone and tried to live my life as best as I could. I forced myself to be busy so that I would stop pestering my husband with constant rejection. I walked so much that the distance prevented me from continuing the journey.
But surprisingly, as soon as I forced myself to do this, my husband began to listen to me again. But I like to think I could have gone on. It is true that you cannot control what your husband will do. But you are in control of what you want to do. Focusing on the negative standing in your life, (obviously,) is not the best way to go about it. It took me a long time to learn this.
You deserve better than treading water. Although it may be hard to see at the time, your marriage is just one part of your life. You have many others. Of course, no one wants to stop their marriage. But if you have nothing to do about it, it’s best not to put yourself dead on your first list. Because in that sense, you suffer twice. You are suffering because of what is happening in your family. But you are also suffering as a person because you are just standing there – just waiting for something that is not in your hands.
Of course, you can take a better picture of yourself, make sacrifices for yourself, resolve family issues, and take advantage of what you can do with your spouse. (All of these things help a lot and can eventually make him come back.) But you can’t control his thoughts or actions. So the best way is to do what you can and then focus on moving forward. Doing this doesn’t mean you have to accept that your husband will never come back – I didn’t. But it does mean you’ve made the decision to not dwell on the negative and put yourself first enough to get on with life – instead of letting it go and seeing it through the negative lens the breakup has brought. .
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