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10 Happiness Secrets From a 4 Year Old
If you want to feel happier, sometimes it can be good to go back to the basics and learn from the people around you who seem to be the happiest. In my life, it’s probably my 4 year old.
He feels very happy.
We often believe that wisdom comes with age. But sometimes the years make us forget what’s really important, as we get caught up in the details of how to feel worried, stressed, and irritated. We can be so focused on teaching our children what we know that we forget how much we have to teach.
So, if you’re ready to remember how to feel happy, here are 10 happiness secrets that my little one would love to share with us “grown ups”!
- Ask for what you want – We often get frustrated or angry, because others cannot guess what we really want. “Don’t ask, don’t get!This is a mantra for my 4 year old son. If he needs something, he tells me. He doesn’t always get it, but he’s always honest about his needs – something to feel happy.
- Say what you think – When was the last time you heard a child do anything other than speak their mind? There is no pretence; No half-truths (unless you catch them doing something naughty!). Basically, speaking your truth – with compassion and some wisdom – is a necessary step to feeling happy.
- I will cry if I want to – Babies know how to express their feelings. They don’t back down. Of course, this means that adults suffer in the supermarket, but have you ever noticed that, when the emotions “come out”, children let them go. Unlike adults, who can hold on to repressed emotions, resentments, and bitterness for decades. So the 4-year-old’s advice is to let yourself feel emotions if you need to. Then let them go.
- You can also add your vel – It’s about being yourself – and expressing the wonder of who you are in everything you do. So that means if you want to wear Paddington’s red vine whenever you feel like it, do it! Who cares? And if that bothers you, you can check the next point…
- Don’t worry about what anyone else thinks – Childhood is a wonderful time when we don’t care what others think. We are so wrapped up in our own universe that we don’t realize that there are other people (or in our heads!) deciding how we look or what we do. The thing is, we can go back to that experience when we choose. Stop worrying about what others think of you. It can be really liberating.
- Spend time with the ones you love – Have you ever seen how children gravitate towards those they like to be with and avoid spending time with those who make them unhappy? Is there really any excuse for this to change as we get older?
- Tell silly jokes – My 4 year old son has just started telling jokes. They’re not funny in the classic sense, and almost always have someone wearing a potty on their head, but they do laugh out loud, and everyone else joins in. Laughter really can be the best therapy and find the funny side. Things – no matter how bleak the situation may seem – can turn a life around.
- Be creative – Sometimes we can get stuck in our heads, problems and worries go round and round. How about jumping in and being creative instead? Doing something completely different can activate the creative side of your brain and help you suddenly discover previously hidden solutions. A 4-year-old’s answer is usually baking a cake with Granny, making up stories with his toys, or painting pictures. How to find your own favorite creative publication?
- If you don’t succeed at first… – When a child is learning to walk, they fall down a lot. They cannot fully coordinate movements. Maybe they don’t have enough muscle strength. Yet they keep walking, towards their dream of walking. They never give up hope. They know they can. And we cheer them on, excited with every wobbly step. How about doing it for ourselves, with our grown-up dreams? Instead of giving up at the first hurdle and then killing yourself?
- Go and get Daisy – Growing up, we rarely take the time to see the beauty in the little things in life. Admiring a sunset or stopping to marvel at the beauty of a small daisy can help you put things back into perspective, feel happier, faster.
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